When you ask what’s for dinner and I respond with a selfie

You asked a simple question, and what you got back was a MILF with a look that makes your stomach drop straight to your groin.

You can't stop staring at the way the light catches her collarbone, the casual confidence in her pose that tells you she already knows exactly what she's doing to you.

You realize dinner was never the point — you're the one being offered something, and every nerve in your body is telling you to stop thinking and start reaching through the screen.